So this is our follow up from our last post. Some of the comments left had us rolling in laughter and so without any further delay, here are some of the funniest comments that were left on that post. We didn’t have enough space to include all of the hilarious comments, so if you would like to read all of them, you can find the post here. Hilarious.
Again, if you have any stories to add, feel free to add them in the comments below as those are the stories we use for these posts.
It was fast and testimony meeting and my brothers friend who was sitting with us fell asleep. After about 3 testimonies there was a long lull. So my brother nudged his friend and said “bishop just called on you to give the closing prayer” so he got up said the closing prayer and came and sat down. After which the bishop got up and said “that was lovely, I would like to officially reopen this testimony meeting for the remainder of the hour.”
Beer and Cigarettes
My oldest two children are just a year apart in age, so keeping them reverent in church was a challenge. I bought a book of file folder games that you could make to entertain them during Sacrament. One of them was called “Word of Wisdom Winners”. It had one side where you put things that were good for your body onto it, and a trash can on the other side for things that are bad for your body. My son was playing with it as the Sacrament was being passed. He misplaced a few of the pieces, and when It was dead silent,yelled out, “Where’s my beer and cigarettes!”
Being a Boob
A woman finished her testimony with “I’m sorry I’m such a big boob.” Then the bishop gets up and says, don’t worry, we like big boobs, before he had a chance to realize what he just said!
The “F” Word
I was listening to the bishop’s young son give his testimony, and during it he mentioned that his family is trying not to say the f-word so much. As soon as he stepped down, the bishop grabbed the microphone and clarified that “By the way, in our home, the f-word is ‘fart’!”
When I was a deacon the bishop’s son sitting next to me pulled out an M80 firecracker and a lighter while we were seated to pass sacrament. During the opening hymn He was passing the firecracker back and forth near the flame while laughing at us for shaking our heads no as vigorously as we could muster. Sure enough just after the song ended and right after we hear “Dear Heavenly Father” I hear the unmistakable sound of a lit fuse next to me and open my eyes just in time to see the kid lean forward and pitch the explosive device under the pews where it landed 3 rows behind us. The explosion was louder than anything I had ever heard. Men, women, and children of all ages screamed like banshees. The bishop jumped up and made a bee line for the culprit and escorted him away for punishment. When my friend grew up and became bishop of the same ward the old firecracker in sacrament story would surface every now and again and served as better punishment than the original I’m sure.
We were visiting a ward one day for a baby blessing. A little boy, about 5 years old, got up to bear his testimony. It was going well, standard 5 year old testimony until the last line… “And I am thankful that God created all the animals, because I really like to eat meat.”
I thought my non-member father was going to pass out from stifling his laughter.
When my daughter was about 7 she asked her dad to go up during testimony meeting. He wasn’t feeling up to it and when she pushed him for a why, he teased “because I’m an evil sinner” She promptly stood up and marched to the pulpit and announced that her daddy couldn’t bear his testimony today because he was an evil sinner. The entire congregation bursted into laughter and the bishop stood up and said in to the microphone “Brother Neff, I’d like to see you in my office after this meeting”!
The Heavens Being Opened
I was playing the organ in a singles ward and one of the men passing the Sacrament to me accidentally tripped and knocked over the organ bench on to the pedals…it was dead quiet and then suddenly there were these loud and long sustained notes going off, followed by short staccato notes as he walked on the pedals to lift the bench back in place. Worst part: he was a new convert and that was his first Sunday passing the Sacrament. Best part: the Bishopric member conducting was awesome and after the Sacrament was over, he made some remark about the Spirit being so strong that the Heavens opened and music poured out Ü Ü
I Hate All of You
When my brother was about 2, my mom dropped him off for nursery and came back a few min later to check on him but he wasn’t there and the teacher told my mom he never came. My mom figured he left while her back was turned and frantically started searching the church for him when she suddenly hears the speakers come on with the voice of my brother. “I hate church!!!!!!!!!! I hate all of you!!!!” He had run up to the podium, All during another wards sacrament meeting ringing throughout the pure silence screams words of hatred. During. Sacrament. 0-0. My mom was absolutely mortified and found him being dragged out of the chapel screaming and crying in that wards bishop’s arms. She made triple sure he stayed put in nursery from then on
My Mom was in town helping with our 3 kiddos under age 4. While the sacrament was being passed, she was helping our 3 year old son color quietly. At home, my wife and I usually refer to our childrens’ body parts with correct anatomical names. Our boy asks grandma to draw him a hump back whale, then a shark, a bigger shark, etc. Apparently, this wasn’t to his standards because he asks her to give the shark a penis. Slightly embarrassed, grandma reluctantly adds a penis to the shark to which my boy shouts out his disapproval: “No Grandma, a BIG PENIS! Draw him a BIG PENIS!”
Gum and Plenty More
When our oldest was about 2 (now 16), we gave her minty gum during sacrament meeting. Biggest mistake ever – but – we were first time parents, so what did we know?! She had stuck the wad up her nose while we thought she was just looking at books on the floor and instead she was pulling STRINGS of gum out of her nose. It was all over her face and her dress. We were dying laughing. As my husband hauled her out for clean up she was crying and yelling “It burns! It burns!”
Here’s another one: Once my little sister leaned over to my mom in sacrament meeting when she was about 4 and sighed heavily and said “Moooooommmm!! I’m sooooo hungry! When are we going to have the “snackerment”?
Okay – one more: When I was 8 months pregnant with my 5th baby, I had seriously lost my brain by then. We had 9:00 church and it was impossible for us to be on time. One day we hustled into church 10 minutes late (picture husband walking hurriedly, shushing 4 kids in tow, and pregnant waddling wife in heels hauling the giant diaper bag bringing up the rear). The bishop shot me a look and a raised eye-brow, to which I shot a look back and said in my mind “What?! We’re ALWAYS late! This is nothing new!” The last verse of the song was being sung and we slipped into our pew on the 2nd row just as the song ended. Then the prayer was said…..THE CLOSING PRAYER THAT IS!! Apparently we had forgot to “spring forward” our clocks for daylights savings time, and it was actually 10:10, not 9:10. During the prayer we stifled our giggles, ducking behind the pew, and when “Amen” was said, the whole congregations burst into laughter! We had totally made a scene shuffling in just in time to sit down for the closing prayer. It was hilarious!
This literally happened yesterday. My sister visited from out of state and was holding our new baby niece. They looked so precious. During sacrament, I subtly pulled out my phone to take a picture and the flash went off. I was mortified.
I was going to be sustained as the Primary President of our ward. I decided that my family and I should sit down in the first, front row of the chapel so that all of the children in our ward would know who I was. I was wearing a blouse and skirt. Unknown to me, my then three year
old son, who was sitting beside me, was also sitting on my skirt. When the bishop asked me to stand to be sustained, I enthusiastically jumped up. However, my skirt fell off me and stayed on the bench. So there I was standing before our entire, ward congregation in my slip.
What Time is it?
My wife and I were recently married and attending Sacrament Meeting. The final speaker was long winded and it was way past time to close the meeting when he started to bear his testimony. The “I knows” seemed to go on forever. An old man sitting behind us was obviously getting impatient, and suddenly said, in a voice loud enough to be heard several rows around, “I wonder if he KNOWS what time it is!”
The Dark Side
A long time ago one of the speakers at my parents ward was from the high council. As soon as the brother got to the podium, my dad’s cell phone, as loud as it could go, said “message from the dark side, there is”. He was mortified.
Stop Kicking me
When I was a teenager, we had a older gentleman that would get up every fast sunday to bear his testimony, which would border on lengthy discourses. My best friends dad was bishop and one fast sunday the gentleman got up and began. After a very lengthy testimony which was not likely to end any time soon. I noticed the bishop ( who was rather tall) slouch in his chair. The older gentleman keep stopping and looking at the floor and after about 5 min. he said “Bishop will you quit kicking my leg.” Needless to say the bishop was a bit red in the face.
I can’t believe I’m sharing this… When my daughter was about 2 we were walking down the hall during class. I could tell she was pooping so I quickly took her into the mother’s room. To my surprise her diaper’s side was riding up her middle and there was NO poop in her diaper. Then it hit me.. I quickly changed her and went in search of it, only to find a small group of moms huddled together trying to determine what the brown lump on the floor was!
Nothing Fishy Here
My brother has Asperger’s syndrome, when we were little he would always take a handful of bread when it came to him. My dad told him before church to only take one that day. So when the tray got to him, my dad pretended to not be watching and shook his head and pointed at my brother when he took a huge handful….my brother put on his poker face and chucked the entire handful of bread up into the air behind his head and was like, “What? Nothing fishy here!” I’ve NEVER laughed so hard in my life!!
47 Replies to “18 Hilarious Embarrassing Sacrament Meeting Stories”
I was visiting my sister’s ward. I have 5 kids and my youngest was about 4 months old. I had to go out into the hall during sacrament meeting to calm the baby. a few minutes later, my sisters comes out and sarcastically thanks me for not turning off my cell phone ringer. The phone had started ringing and my ringtone when my husband calls says “I love you baby” and then makes kissing noises over and over in a voice that sounds like he sucked helium. I guess when it went my purse was at the end of the bench I had been sitting on and my sister was on the other with my 4 kids and her 3 kids in between us. It was quite the wrestling match to get to, find, and silence my phone. The best part is that everyone in her ward thought it was her that had made the mistake, not me!
When my kids were young I thought it was important to teach them the anatomical correct words. We had just moved into a new ward and my 2 year old son was very wiggly. I was trying to keep him sitting on my lap during the sacrament and he kept trying to slide off so I put my hands on my knees so he couldn’t slide all the way off when he yelled out, at the quietest moment of sacrement, “take your hands off of my penis” I was so embarrassed, I handed him to his father. and rethought about the importance of teaching him the anatomical correct words.
Our family was sitting towards the front in Sacrament meeting. The meeting was almost over. I would be teaching Relief Society in a few minutes. My 2-year-old daughter sat on my lap. All was quiet. Suddenly, out of nowhere, she started yelling, “Shut up!!” She got louder and louder as she yelled, “Shut up! Shut UP! S-H-U-T U-P!!!!” I was totally mortified and clapped my hand over her mouth. The minute I did that, she peed all over me.
When I was about four, I was laying on my dad’s lap at church, staring up at the ceiling. During the sacrament, I suddenly yelled out, “Daddy! You have hairs up your ‘mose’!” To which everyone giggled at. A few minutes later, still during sacrament, I was now laying on the other side of the pew. This time I yelled “mommy! You have hairs up your ‘mose’ too!” At this point my parents said everyone was laughing except for my mother.
Every once in awhile, someone forgets to turn their cell phone on vibrate during sacrament meeting, it happens to all of us. Today during sacrament meeting, the second speaker had just barely started and all of a sudden there’s a “meow” from a few rows behind me, followed by some giggles and people looking around. I thought someone was just trying to be funny and talking to the person next to them and was just louder than they should have been. Then came the second “meow”, followed by more laughter than the first time. It happened one more time after that and almost the whole branch was laughing. Turns out it was the Sister Missionaries’ cell phone. Their faces were so red.
When I was little, when the sacrament was being passed, the passer got to our row with the water and my brother (probably around 5 or 6 at the time) yells really loud “Finally! It’s time for the drink! I’m thirsty!”
It was time for the annual primary program. My daughter was about for. Knowing how important it was for the children to stay seated, her teacher told them that unless they were sick, they were not to leave their seats. We were singing the sacrament hymn, seated on the second row, when I heard someone whisper my name. I looked up to see my little sweetheart puking on the floor right in front of the poor deacons! I slid out of the pew and scooped her up before my husband even knew what was going on. I ended up driving home, and the deacons ended up cleaning up and trying not to join in the pukefest.
There was a lot of sibling rivalry with my brother growing up. As a teenager, I hated that my brother never got in trouble for falling asleep during Sacrament meeting. One day our family was sitting on the front row, he was leaning over over with his hands on his knees asleep. I gave him a little nudge to wake him up. I guess the nudge was a little stronger than I realized. He did a forward roll off the bench coming to a stop when his butt and legs hit the stand with a loud bang. He quickly scrambled up and sat back on the bench. He was so embarrassed – but he didn’t fall asleep for the rest of the meeting. Even better nobody knew he had a little “help”.
When brought up to face the ward as a newly ordained deacon, I was standing to the right of the bishop with my hands in my pockets. I looked at my mother’s friend in the front row and she mouthed to me, “Your zipper’s down!” I looked down to see my whitey tighties shining in bright contrast to my black slacks. I ducked behind the bishop to zip it up and the zipper stuck. After what felt like an hour, it finally zipped and I emerged on the other side of the bishop. He had no idea.
One time I was having really bad allergies and I could feel a big sneeze coming on (and my sneezes are ridiculously loud). The chapel was dead silent while the sacrament was being passed so I tried plugging my nose to stifle the noise. Only when it came out it sounded somewhere between a snort and a high pitched whistle. My two brothers and I start cracking up, hands clamped over our mouths to try to stop laughing. My Mom leans over and whispers, “What is going on?! Be quiet!” My older brother replied with, “Did you not hear her sneeze?” She replied, “Oh that’s what that was.” and started laughing too. To this day my brothers still bring that up at family parties.
When I was in College at BYU, a new student, and recent convert was giving a talk to the huge student ward. Can’t remember the subject matter, but instead of saying ‘persecution’, he said ‘prostitution’! Of course everyone gasped and were laughing hysterically. Poor fellow turned beet red…
So One time my older brother was going to be blessing the sacrament. During the opening hymn the other priest started FREAKING OUT! He was jumping all around and all but screaming! MY brother looked down to find a MOUSE running around under the sacrament table! I guess the other priest was scared of mice. So my brother proceeded to try whacking it to kill it with his scriptures! During the opening of the meeting! The bishop came down and told them to be quiet. We were all laughing! Except some left… and didn’t come back that day…
My husband and I were called into the Stake President’s office. We sat down and he asked us about our family and how many kids we had. I told him we had 2 girls, he had a confused look on his face and said that he felt an impression that we had 3 kids. I told him that I had very rough pregnancies and 2 would have to do. He said that was ok and he was not going to argue with me. He issued my husband a calling as Elders Quorum President and we left his office. 2 weeks later, I learned that I was indeed pregnant and was 4 weeks along. The pregnancy was a smooth one, I was surprised. When my son was born, he was perfect!!! On the fast Sunday we had him blessed, our Stake President came to our meeting. When I bore my testimony, I told the story of what happened in the Stake President’s office and about the inspiration 7 months earlier (my son was 4 weeks early, but very healthy). I included in my testimony the advice to never go into the Stake Presidents office unless you want to come out pregnant!!! He turned BEAT RED but laughed along with the rest of the congregation.It was HILARIOUS!!!
My mom felt her hair clip falling just as the sacrament tray was being passed in front of her. Instinctively, she flung her hand upwards to grab the clip and hit the tray so hard it flew over her head and into the aisle behind her, spraying its contents everywhere.
Was it the water or the bread?
I was once a Baptist preacher, and now I am the Elder’s Quorum Instructor and Branch Missionary.
Well, it took a little while to understand the differences in how things go, which was evident immediately.
The Branch President asked me to give the opening prayer. When it was time, I stood up and gave the prayer, then sat down. After the meeting, several people commented on enjoying my prayer, and one even said “I like your style”. I was quite confused, as all I did was ask the Spirit to be with us so we can learn what we need to learn. Sounded pretty basic to me.
Then the Branch President approached me and said “Brother Beyer, that was a good opening prayer. In the future, when you are asked to give a prayer during Sacrament, please do so from the podium with the microphone, not by talking really loud from the back row.”
In my parents ward a young mother took her baby and young son out to the restroom. She got her son on the toilet who was still at the point in toilet training that he still needed assistance once finished using the toilet. She was changing the diaper on the baby when she heard the restroom door close and noticed her son was no longer in the restroom and was glad that he had figured out how to finish up on his own. Meanwhile, in the Sacrament meeting, row after row started laughing from the back of the chapel leading up towards the front as her son walks in with his pants and underwear around his ankles, holding a hand full of toilet paper, and shuffling towards the second row bench at the front where his dad was sitting. Once he got to the row, everyone sees the dad reach out and pull up his pants as fast as he could and the boy quickly disappeared into the row his dad and siblings were sitting in. After the meeting my mother went up to his mother and asked her if she knew what happened and she had no clue as she had still been in the restroom changing a diaper when all of this happened and her husband hadn’t told her during the meeting. She was rather embarrassed.
My uncle has been known to go on long rants about nothing; and he loves to talk. One day on Fast Sunday in Sacrament meeting, he got up as the first to bear his testimony. He talked, talked and talked. He used up the whole hour given to share your testimony! Our Bishop was knew but finally, he got the courage to kick the back of my Uncle’s leg and he finally sat down! He was the only one to bear his testimony that day! I’ve never been so embarrassed!
My younger sister had a history of misbehavior during Sacrament Meeting and was told that a spanking awaited her after her next outburst. Well, sure enough one Sunday she was misbehaving and getting on my mother’s nerves. Finally, my mom told my father (who was so far oblivious to the misbehavior) to take her out to the foyer. As he grabbed her hand and started walking/pulling her out she began to yell, “I’m done now, Dad! I’m done! Help, Bishop! Help me, Bishop!” The poor Bishop didn’t know what to do and my dad just kept trudging slowly to the door as if nothing was happening.
Uh… huh! It had been a debate between young children for a couple of weeks who the new bishop of the ward was going to be. Well, when the big day arrived and my husband was presented for Bishop, my 8 yr old starts jumping up and down… “My Dad won!!! My Dad won!!!” We were off to a rockin’ start…
A few years ago, at our Primary program, it was the Sunbeams’ turn for their part. One little boy (back story: his parents are very strict in raising kids -absolutely no goofing, period – and he’s the youngest of 9) got up to the microphone, shoved it to his mouth, and loudly proclaimed “Hola! That’s Spanish!” and proceeded with a few other words in a few other languages. The ward enjoyed the comic relief as his mother slowly died of embarassment. It was brought up in various talks for months to come.
The Three Amigoes was quite a favorite at my house growing up. During Sacrament Meeting once, my sister turned around and asked our next door neighbor if she could have his watch when he was dead. That row cracked up for the rest of the meeting.
When my dad was young, about 50 plus years ago, he was sitting in sacrament, and his older brother was giving a talk. In the middle of the talk, my dad, then 5 or 6 years old loudly proclaimed, BS, but the actual words. The entire congregation started at my dad, except for his parents who were giving the older brother the dirty look, for they new where my dad had learned that phrase from.
Fast forward 30 plus years. We are visiting my grandma, in the same congregation. My grandma had dentures. I kept pointing at her teach. She said that if I pointed one more time, she would bite my finger. Being young, I pointed again, and she bit me. I burst into tears crying. My mom handed me over quickly to my dad and told him to take me out. He asked what out, and she said just take her out. My dad got to the door, but before opening it, I screamed, “Grandma Bit Me!!!”
My mother told me the story of one Sunday she will never forget. My mother had 6 children in 8 years, I am the fourth. When my two little brothers were young, they are 15 months apart, my mother at the time was weaning my youngest brother off nursing. One Sunday when she thought we were finally being quiet, she was really enjoying the speaker and not paying much attention to what the kids were doing because we were quiet. Then she started getting weird looks from the Bishop. Not realizing they were directed at her, she kept listening intently to the speaker. She was really enjoying sacrament meeting, which she had not been able to do for a long while. Suddenly, the bishops looks turned into embarrassment and his hand went up in front of his eyes and he looked the other way. interested in what was going on, my mother started looking around casually to see what the Bishop was trying not to look at. Catching a glimpse of something swinging around in circles, she turned and saw at the end of the bench, the older of my two younger brothers had pulled a tampon out of her purse, opened it, and was swinging it around like a helicopter. That was not the worst of it, while his brother was playing helicopter with her tampons, my youngest brother, wanting to nurse, and unbeknownst to my mother, pulled my mother’s shirt down (it had an very stretchy elastic neck line) and had left her completely exposed to everyone on the stand.
This was years ago when I was a laurel in young womens. My leaders were very excited this particular Sunday because an inactive girl had come, and they wanted her to have a very spiritual experience. The lesson was going along wonderfully and it was very quiet when said girl farted. Everyone was able to keep it together very well. But you know those times when your laughter seems to be uncontrollable and no matter what you can’t contain it? Well after a few seconds I couldn’t hold it in any longer and I just laughed and laughed. The worst part though? Everyone just looked at me and calmly waited for me to stop. I felt that I needed to explain myself so I just said that “I just thought of a funny joke”.
Another one, when my brother was about 3 he had just learned the names for male and female body parts. I got out of Sunday School and saw my mom holding his hand and quickly pulling him along as he skipped and sang “vagina, vagina, vagina….” over and over.
This is not embarrassing, but it is very funny. My youngest daughter was 3 years old and we were coming out of church. She had just learned about the miracles of Jesus that day in sunbeams and was talking about them on the way out to the car. We all climbed into the car and to help my 3 year old climb into her seat, we had put a case of water bottles on the floor in front of her car seat. It served a dual purpose, we always had water in the car and she had a step stool. So, I didn’t think much of when she climbed onto the water bottles to get into her seat. But today, just as she climbed onto the water bottles, she stopped, smiled, and then said very loudly so everyone around us could hear, “Hey mom! Look! I’m walking on water!” We still laugh about the irony of that one!
I had a total mommy brain moment one morning walking into sacrament meeting at church. I was hurrying along and scooped up the little toddler at my heels thinking it was my son trying to make an escape. I walked a few more steps before I realized, “My older son has my baby. Oh my gosh, this is not my kid I am taking to sit with us. Oh my gosh, where are her parents.” To top it off, I was late and standing in front of a lot of sitting people at the time. Awkward!
My big sister was little at the time about 4 or 5 years old. All the rest of my older siblings decided to get up and bear their testimonies and so she followed and was last to bear her testimony. The first two did fine, they were cute and the same testimony you hear from all the little kids and then my big sister got up, looked around the room, grinned, and the only word she said was, “poop.” She then walked out of the chapel.
After my wife and I got married, we visited my parents’ ward and it was fast and testimony meeting. My Grandmother who lived with my parents was 80 at the time and she’s always spoken her mind, no matter how random or crazy it was. My family dreads of having her go up to bear her testimony because we never knew what she was going to say. She got up to bear her testimony and for a while, it seemed like we were going to hear a normal testimony from her, we were surprised. Nope, we were wrong. Sitting in the second row, was a visitor from California (I think) who was African-American. My grandmother stopped mid-sentence of her testimony, looked right at the woman and said loudly, “Oh what a beautiful black lady!” We were shocked and speechless…probably how that poor sister felt as she was put on the spotlight.
Elder Jeffery R. Holland spoke at our stake conference. My year old son and I had been listening on the Public Address. I thought I’d at least see the last bit of Elder Holland’s talk. With him in my arms we snuck into the very back row. My son then pointed and yelled, “Clock!”. The Apostle turned and looked at me and my my son. Elder Holland then looked at the clock and when on with his talk.
Years ago Elder Meal A. Maxwell was at our Stake Conference. We had just installed a new podium that could be raised and lowered electrically. While the speaker was at the podium Elder Maxwell found the button that operates the podium. Since this was a new thing he tried to find out what it was for. The podium went up and down several times until the Stake President speed him. Meanwhile the speaker was trying to maintain his composure while trying to continue to speak. We were all trying not to laugh.
My friend comes from a family of 9 kids. Growing up, her family would sit in the front row of the chapel. One Sunday, my friend who was a toddler at the time, reached into her mom’s purse and unwrapped a tampon. She stood up on the pew, turned to face the entire congregation, and proceeded to swing it abover her head while holding the string and giggling. The congregation burst into laughter… her mom was absolutely mortified!
Quite a few years back I attended one of my cousin’s baby blessings along with my family and all my cousins and all my aunts and uncles (if you’ve seen My Big Fat Greek Wedding- the loud crazy family- that captures my extended family to a tee- just picture everyone as short, blondes instead). The fact that EVERYONE and their dog decided to attend this sacrament meeting made it all the worse. So, there I sat smack dab in the middle of the pews in the sacrament meeting room when after a long blessing my uncle giving the blessing said the words “in the name of Jesus Christ”. I thought he was done so I lifted up my head and said a very loud “AMEN”…only to find that the blessing was still continuing. Stifled laughs could be heard all around the room.
One more story. Even a few years earlier than the previous story (when I was a fresh beehive in young womens) all the young women in my ward were charged to make poodle skirts to wear while serving at a relief society dinner function. When the day of the event came around I was soo proud of my poodle skirts and how beautiful it looked- thanks to my mom’s sewing abilities. Right as the function was starting and all the women were starting to show up I needed to get a drink of water. I went to the drinking fountain, which happened to be right by the front doors, and started chugging away at the water. While I was there, a large group of women walked through the doors. I stood up to wave to them and say hello when I realized that the elastic in my skirt had somehow come undone and I was standing there with my skirt around my ankles. I was mortified. I picked up my skirt and ran down the hallway. Despite my skirt breaking, it all turned out in the end. We pulled the skirt tight around my waist and held it with a hair elastic and called it good. As I was serving the older women of the ward, we all
had some good laughs
One Sunday while the sacrament was being passed, my 3 yr old son was resting his head on my shoulder while i was holding him. He was looking around but being quiet, so I didn’t think anything of it until I hear him say loud enough for the whole ward to hear “mommy why is that lady so ugly?” And pointed. I tried to sush him but it was no good. Everyone had seen and heard. I was mortified and still can’t look the woman in the eye to this day!
I went to my friend’s ward and it happened to be the primary program that day. One little girl got up and she had a very angry look on her face and in a very angry tone said “I accepted Heavenly Father’s plan.” The entire congregation stifled laughter!
We are in a very close-knit ward. One of our members, who is a leader in the Boy’s Scouts, just got back from a week long campout at the beach with the scouts. He had to give a talk and as he began he was sharing a bit of his experience about what it was like camping at the beach. He started to say something that kinda made everyone feel a little awkward by saying something along the lines of, “I have to admit, it was a little distracting being near the beach, I mean, all you see are these bikinis walking around. Especially this one particular bikini that kept walking by our camp back and forth. I’m sure it was distracting to the boys, but I also found it hard to concentrate on more spiritual things…. but enough about the Bishop.” and we all just died laughing.
Another story- My sister was born in the 80s and my parents are big-die-hard 80s hair band fans. I guess one song that my sister heard quite often was “Welcome to the Jungle” by Guns and Roses. During the sacrament prayer (while my sister was very young) my sister started to yell out, “You know where you are? You’re in the jungle baby!! You’re gonna diieeeee!!!” my parents were horrified hahahahaha!
It was fast and testimony meeting, and during the opening hymn, we suddenly see the chorister get a look of fear on her face and she tries to move out of the way and still conduct at the same time. A mouse had run across her feet and she was trying her best to stay calm. Well later in the meeting, the mouse was trying to get off the stand, but people would keep coming up to bare their testimonies and the mouse would get scared and stay put. FINALLY it runs down the stairs and you see rows of the congregation cringe and jump whenever the mouse ran by.
Another time, we were at Stake Conference and we were in a Tabernacle. This Tabernacle has a balcony and my family was sitting on the front row of the balcony. My brother had gone to get a drink of water and was coming back. He was walking down the stairs of the balcony, and all of the sudden, I hear a very loud THUD. I turn and see my brother laying flat on the stairs. As he was coing down the stairs, he had lost his footing, and flew down the stairs landing face first. After the meeting, the people behind us told my brother it was a great fall, but not a great landing. We still mention it sometimes.
Back when I turned twelve, one sacrament meeting, the bishop called me up so that they could present me with my faith in god award and sustain me. When everyone raised their right hands to sustain me, I had no idea that I also was suppose to raise my hand. The bishop then said,”You know, you can sustain yourself too.” I awkwardly raised my right hand and could hear giggles coming from various areas of the congregation. I was so embarrassed that day.
We lived in a small branch and held our meetings in a older building the church had purchased. My son was almost 3 years old at the time. I was giving a talk during Sacrament and my husband did not notice that he had slipped away. He was already potty trained but needed help wiping. The back of the chapel had a center isle with doors that swung open. In the middle of my talk, my sweet young son barged through the swinging doors, assumed the position and started yelling “Mom, wipe my butt” I really wanted to crawl out of the building forever. This stories lives on with him and was told at his wedding. Paybacks are awesome.
When our son was two years old, we were sitting at the very back of the chapel and the sacrament was being passed. He was making a little more noise than we liked, so I quietly encouraged him to use his quiet voice. Then, as loud as he could, he yelled out, “I don’t have a quiet voice!”
When I was about 6 or 7 years old our chapel had those old wooden benches and without trying I farted really loud. That old bench amplified it so loud and it was during the sacrament so it was really quiet. The only thing I could do to save my embarrassment was blame it on my brother. “John!!!!” He didn’t get any dessert that night. : )